We had fun, what more can I say?
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It's been a big week for Beatrice (and me) - Sarah B, her new nanny, started on Monday. She'll be taking care of Beatrice from 7am-4pm Monday through Thursday. Zack and I are so happy, as Sarah B is just wonderful with Beatrice. She's certainly more qualified to stay with Beatrice than I am - she has a 3 page resume listing all of her experience nanny-ing and teaching preschool, infant CPR, etc.! And Beatrice adores her. They've been having such fun together this week, which is especially good given that she is in the midst of teething hell (e.g., sleepless nights, constant crying, gnawing her hand/anything she can put in her mouth) AND has a bad cold. We did make it to the zoo today which helped some in terms of distraction.
And then of course there are all the other fun activities she's been doing with Sarah B - playing outside, going to the park, sitting in bags, playing peek-a-boo, walking around, talking, reading, practicing waving hello and goodbye, trying to drink from a glass, etc.
It's been a big change for me too. One I'm still trying to adjust to...on the one hand I'm so happy that we've found someone wonderful to be Beatrice's nanny. It means I can go back to "work" (I now define any place where I get to go to the bathroom BY MYSELF only as "work", and anywhere I don't - e.g. home with Beatrice - as work, no quotation marks). It means I can finally get the house unpacked. It means lots of good things for Beatrice. On the other hand, I am totally selfish and want to keep Beatrice just to myself and have her love me and only me...or something insane like that. Luckily we make enough money to be able to make this decision, rather than have it made for us by our financial situation. So the decision, and all the accompanying guilt, is mine. Or rather ours, but I would guess it's more mine. Seems that soul-wrenching guilt, much like bigger hips, is primarily the domain of mothers.
So...so far it's going well. Sarah B and I were talking today while at the zoo with Beatrice, and she told me she thought I was a good mom and I nearly lost it weeping. Later I called my Mom and did lose it for a bit (so did she, by the way). So the guilt is definitely creeping in, but I do feel that by going back to work (part-time for now) and having someone as wonderful as Sarah B with Beatrice, that I am doing the right thing for all of us. Plus I'll get to go pee ALL BY MYSELF!!!
1 comment:
From your blog you sound like a fantastic mother and Beatrice looks happy and loved. And another person, specially the one qualified and experienced, will just add another dimension to Beatrice’s life. Good luck with the “job” and congratulations on doing the really hard job so well for 9 months.
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